Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Christmas thank you list

1. I am thankful to be alive even though the world is in a mess and I pee too much.


2. I am thankful I pee too much; it could be the opposite.


3. I am thankful for family and friends, even though I can count them all on both hands.


4. I am thankful for two feet because I have room for ten more friends.


5. I am thankful for having enough to eat, even though my diet is restricted to fiber.


6. I am thankful for restaurants so I can sneak out and pig out.


7. I am thankful for a daughter who makes me homemade mac and cheese for the times I can’t make it to McDonald’s.


8. I am thankful for a half-assed good brain that somehow still works after years of non-use.


9. I am thankful for a body that still functions fairly well in spite of years of abuse.



10. I am thankful for a wife who somehow loves me enough to put up with me day in and day out. Nights don’t count; I am a sound sleeper.


11. I am thankful for enough money to get by on. We all need to live within our means in any case.


12. I am thankful for a roof over our heads, even though I know we need new shingles and I will have to install them myself. I’m too old for this shit, but I’ll “get ‘er done” – somehow.


13. I am thankful for the opportunity to have written and published two novels, to be working on the third, and still have enough time to keep up with Twitter, Facebook, a Website and a blog.



14. I am thankful for technology, because without it our planet would have no hope, and there is no way I am going write anything long hand, let alone a novel.


15. I am thankful for the young people of the world. They are smart and ready to stand up for the things that are right about the world and willing to dissent to make things better.


16. I am thankful for the peacekeepers for protecting freedom, dignity, and the right to pursue happiness.


17. I am thankful for what hair I have left, mainly because I can’t afford a hair transplant and wifey won’t let me have one anyway.


18. I am thankful for what time I have left on the planet, even though some wish I would leave post haste.


19. I am thankful that even though Keith Richards and I are the same age, he looks like…well, Keith Richards.


20. Lastly, I am thankful for a life that, in spite of its dramatic ups and downs, I have arrived at a place where I smile a lot, wish everyone well, and truly care about all life on our planet.


I’m just saying,

Mittster

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